The Risk of Avoiding Failure
The long-awaited conclusion to my series on victory and failure
Here we go! My thoughts on failure.
We’ll define failure, explore our experiences with risk, and, as a bonus, I’ll sprinkle in a few equations for those of us who miss the “simplicity” of math and physics.
Defining Failure
What does failure mean? Better, what does it feel like?
Shame, fear, anger, embarrassment, guilt, self-doubt.
Call me crazy, but in the long game we’re all playing, these emotions are largely a good thing. The flywheel of self-fulfillment is the direct result of our mad dash away from these emotions and into the warm embrace of victory.
Unfortunately, too much of a good thing can become a bad thing. When failure starts surfacing as a loss of motivation, it’s time to figure out a new place to win. If you’re curious why that matters read: The Importance of Winning
What does this all mean?
Equation #1: Failure = Risk
Everyone loves doing the things they’re good at. It’s comfortable. It’s familiar. It’s easy. The risky stuff invites failure. And who wants to deal with that?
Baby’s First Steps
Well, pretty much everyone has to. From the moment we are born, we’re hard-wired to explore and push beyond our boundaries. Our first steps start with constant failures as we struggle to get off the ground and force our legs to work.
But then. Almost all at once. It happens. We stand!
And thus the great paradox of life is revealed.
Your parents don’t record all the failures. They only record “Baby’s First Steps”. That’s why every success unintentionally hides the trials it took to get there. Without taking those risks, without going through all those tribulations, without falling over and over again, “Baby’s First Steps” would have never occurred.
As babies, we intuitively understand this. We keep trying, failing, and trying again until we succeed. This brings us to our second equation:
Equation #2: Failure² = Victory
This clarifies the myth of overnight success. If you see something that seems like an “overnight success”, it’s probably best to approach it with copious skepticism.
There is no such thing as failure
Failure will happen. Again. And again. And again.
What if you can’t seem to stop failing?
Start by reframing failure as a series of lessons. Then ask yourself, is there anything left to learn? If yes, then get back up. You WILL learn how to walk.
This leads us to our final equation.
Equation #3: Risk² = Victory
It might seem obvious when I write it down. All we’re doing is combining equations #1 and #2 to create equation #3. But this equation feels wrong. Risk is dangerous. Our survival instinct tells us to avoid scary things.
This is a primordial instinct hardwired from thousands of years ago when our ancestors faced death every day. Every risk they took could be fatally dangerous. Our privilege is that the scary things we avoid aren’t generally lethal (and if it is, this article might not be for you). We get the chance to take risks and exponentially increase our chances of success.
Ignore your intuitions. Embrace uncertainty.
Where does that leave us? When confronted with failure, it’s best to remember your roots. We all got up dozens of times before we walked. Why should it be any different for your next endeavor?
“Failure will never overtake you if your determination to succeed is strong enough”
Both quotes in this article are from “The Greatest Salesman in the World”